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greetings everyone, my name is marc. i am a 28 y/o white boy that grew up in toronto, but who was raised in montreal.

i come from a working class background. it is unlikely that anyone in my entire family tree has graduated from university; i know this because i have an uncle who is a genealogy nut. none of my 4 siblings or myself have graduated high school. my parents were members of a conservative cult, but this may only be a partial explanation for why i found myself dropping out of high school at age 16 to flip burgers.

i am glad of every event that has causally affected me, because they constitute the fate that has led me to my present state of being. i spent my teenage years working in the service industry, as well as in my family trade, bricklaying. eventually i began to travel around the united states, south america, and canada in the manner of a hobo (hitchhiking, hopping trains, living in a tent & out of a backpack).

eventually i returned to montreal, where i had a few love affairs, got a job dishwashing, and eventually enrolled in university at the age of 25. i was absent direction, and decided to follow a yearning that i have always felt and study philosophy.

it's been three years in university. studying philosophy has helped my immensely: in terms of the personal reasons that i pursued it, i am beginning to suspect that grasping philosophy in the hopes that it provides a therapy will not be satisfying. however, philosophy has also provided me a conceptual background, training in reading, thinking, and most importantly, writing. despite this, i still have a lurking fear that i will never actually be able to release myself from some kind of narcissistic guilt realting to my productivity.

i've learned a lot, and have come to clarify my vision for myself as a writer and an artist. towards that effect, i added a second major to my program: "art history and film studies." the idea is that this program will teach me two separate lexicons, which will allow me to work in a more broad field as a critic and essayist. i really ought to be studying english literature and creative writing, but in my perception of myself as a literary figure, those things are closer to home. i can study novels in my own time, but the visual arts and cinema are further removed from my experience, so i should seek professional training. while i am working as a critic and establishing myself as a part of the canon, i will, in some future, be working on the true project of novels that are secretly philosophy books--like dostoyevsky, nietzsche, bolano.

in the meantime, the only thing people want to hear about, is that linux is my hobby. i use arch btw, i3gaps, polybar, write documents in latex.

i apologize for this overly personal introduction; it obviously indicates that i'm not in the best place right now, which is true. things are going quite poorly with my romantic partner--it may be over. this semester i have worked very hard on school after a really, really bad fall semester. for various complicated reasons, i have felt alienated from my schoolmates and have followed a very lonely academic year. i am looking forward to the end of the year, and summer.

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only those exactly like myself will want to read this - by aeymxq - 28-03-2019, 12:12 AM